Hey guys! I 'm gonna be out having some medical test done today so I've invited my blogging friend Jodi Chapman to fill in for me. She'll be talking about people pleaseing. This is somthing I struggle with. Before we get to the post I wanna share a little with out about Jodi.
Jodi Chapman writes Soul Speak – a daily blog that focuses on seeing life through a lens of gratitude and positivity. She is the bestselling author of the Soulful Journals series – writing-prompt journals that help you go within and get to know yourself better. She is also the author of the upcoming book, Go For It! She believes that our thoughts become our reality, and our actions lead us to our dreams. She is happily married to her best friend and co-writer, Dan Teck. They live in southern Oregon with their four fuzzy kids.www.soulspeakbyjodi.com
This is a really important (and sometimes really hard) question to answer.
In an ideal world, we are living for ourselves and only doing things that make us feel great and are on our authentic path.
But…it doesn’t always work this way. It’s normal to want to please others. It’s normal to want to be liked. But ask yourself at what expense are you willing to sacrifice your own wants and desires to fit in.
hink of how you live and the decisions you have made and continue to make.
Are you making them based on what you think people will want or expect you to do?
Are you making them because someone else’s voice (a parent, a spouse, a friend) is inside of you directing how you live?
Are you making them because you don’t want to upset anyone?
Are you making them because that’s how you’ve always done it?
And now think about how you want to live. The answers are always within us if we just take the time to listen.
As the answers come to you, write them down. And as you write them down, make sure that it is your authentic voice coming up with the answers. This is an exercise that you can keep coming back to with every part of your life – every decision, every action you make, every second of how you live your day.
Make sure you are living YOUR life – whatever that means for YOU.
There may be friction…
Sometimes when you start coming into your own power – your own authentic self – the self you know you were meant to be – friction occurs with those around you. When someone we love changes, it can sometimes be seen as threatening. It can bring up emotions, fears, and questions about our own life. This is why so many people resist it and why so many of us live lives that we know aren’t our best lives – comfortable, “I’m not rocking the boat” lives. And through this process of finding your own voice, you may have to let go of the voices you have carried within you – and this may mean letting go just in your mind or letting go of that person in reality as well.
Sometimes the perceived friction is only in our heads…
We all know how active our imaginations can be. When we are consciously deciding to live our best lives, we can start imagining how rocking the boat will lead to anger, disconnect, and complete withdrawal from those we love. We just know they won’t support us or understand this new person we are becoming. We get ourselves all worked up just thinking about showing them our authentic self. We are so afraid we won’t be accepted. And sometimes we aren’t. But more often than not, our loved ones completely support us and are completely okay with our changes. And we wonder why we were so worked up about it in the first place.
Showing ourselves and the world who we really are can be a scary, vulnerable place. But it can also be an empowering place. You get to be you – fully you.
If we stay conscious and continue to examine each moment of how we live, we will learn more and more about ourselves and get closer to living our authentic life.
Now that’s worth living for!
Labels: guest blogging, healing, self
